"Nya nya nya! Something's wrong with Tezuka-buchou!"

"You shouldn't talk about other people, Eiji."

"But Oishi~! It's true!" The red-head gestured wildly. "Isn't it, Ochibi-chan!?"

"Che," the first-year regular turned away. "None of my business."

"It is true!" Momoshiro chimed in. "He didn't even give the viper any laps or anything when he tried to grab my ass!"

"I was not trying to grab your ass!"

"You so were!"

"Was not, idiot!"

"Stupid snake!"

"Fushuu~!!"

The others proceeded to ignore the rest of their argument.

"I hope he's not sick."

"There's very little chance of that, Kawamura."

"Are you sure?"

Inui pulled out his notebook, flipping to a very creased and marked-up page. "According to my data, there's only a three-percent chance of Tezuka getting ill."

"Waa! So low!?"

"If my calculations are correct," he adjusted his glasses. "The reason for his unusual behavior is..."

Everyone stared with wide-eyed attention.

"...he's in a good mood."

There was a collective gasp around the clubroom.

"It can't be!"

"Buchou!?"

"In a good mood!?"

"How did this happen!?"

The ruckus settled when a chuckle was heard, and everyone turned toward Fuji.

"Do you know something about this?"

"Saa..."

"C'mon, Fuji-senpai, tell us."

"For the team!"

"Fujiko-chan~"

The tensai chuckled again. "The truth is..." He looked suspiciously around. "Tezuka's in a good mood because..." Everyone moved in a little closer. "...he got laid."

Another simultaneous gasp.

"Oh my god!"

"With who!?"

"Atobe Keigo."

"Nyaaa!!"

"He's fraternizing with the enemy!"

"Fushuu~"

"How did you find this out, Fuji?"

"Guys, it's none of our business!"

Fuji spoke anyway. "Atobe of course told Kabaji, who mentioned it to Rokkaku's Itsuki, who said something to Saeki, who told Yuuta, who asked me."

"I can't believe it."

"We could use this somehow..."

"Inui, I don't think you should-"

"You're right!" Bounce! "We can do whatever we want and get away with it!"

"Is that so?"

Everyone jumped back...by about a mile.

"Tezuka!"

"If you all have time to stand around and talk, perhaps you should be out running laps. Everyone do-"

They cringed, but then realized their captain had stopped when a musical medley of a popular Gackt song started playing. Tezuka retrieved his cell phone from his jacket pocket, and turned his back to the others while he spoke into it.

The group held their breaths while he talked, glancing at each other in fear. How many laps would he make them do? A hundred? A thousand!? Would he make them guzzle Penal Tea!?

Tezuka finished his call, and hung up his phone. Then he turned back to his team.

They gulped.

"Dismissed."

And then as quickly as he'd appeared, he was gone.

Everyone blinked in confusion, until it dawned on them.

"We're saved!" Kikumaru jumped with glee into Oishi's arms, and kissed him soundly.

Oishi blushed furiously.

"Hooray!" Momoshiro and Kaidou danced together...then realized what they were doing and jumped apart. "Get away from the ass!"

"Idiot!"

And there was much rejoicing.

Atobe closed his cell phone, and slid silently away from the open window of Seigaku's tennis club room. He would bask in their thanks later; for now, he had an impromptu date to attend.

And he smiled. It put him in an exceptionally good mood.